Thursday, March 22, 2012


I love him!  He's my first born.  The first.  The one who gets the worst of everything.   Everything he does is new to us.  The child that has overprotective parents.  The child that sooo much is expected from.   He's handsome, wonderful, kind, soft spoken, smart, funny, talented, and a person I love.  I adore him.  I love his juicy lips.  His giant eyes.  His hair!   He ran for Student Body office at school.  This is the text I got yesterday right after school.  "Didn't win".  That's it.  It's over.  He's defeated, heartbroken, and I cried.  I hate seeing my kids not getting everything their hearts want.  I hate seeing them hurt.  I hate seeing them defeated.  As I was thinking about it this morning at 1:47am to be exact, I wondered if that's how Heavenly Father feels about us?  Does he want us to get everything our hearts desires?  Does he hurt when we hurt?  Does he want to make it easy for us?  I came to this conclusion.  He's a dad.  A father. A parent.  Of course he does.  He only wants us to be happy.  But I have to admit that the times my heart has been broken are the times that I've learned the most in life.   He knows that too.  I've gained greater empathy for others.  I've learned compassion.  I've learned to work a little harder.  And I've tasted a little of the bitter that always makes the sweet taste so delicious.  So to my first born....It's only the beginning, but there is so much sweet to be had.  Just wait:)  XOXOXO

1 comment:

  1. The first born are also spoiled in a way the others aren't! I always told Melanie that Heavenly Father sent her first because she was a spirit strong enough and patient enough for us to learn on. WOW .... bless her heart we had lots of learning and I love her for still loving me back. It is so very hard to watch when your kids have to do hard things. When they are heartbroken. Our Father in Heaven never wants us to hurt but he knows the big picture. He knows the better part when the answer is not what they wanted. I have learned this SOOOO much over the last 6 years. My kids have all gone through some pretty tough times. They would be the first to tell you that they wouldn't change it for anything. They are now seeing a bit of the big picture and the blessings are so much greater than the heartache. Hang in there Lisa .... there is more to come :) I love you and I totally would have voted for Jed !!